


empty whiskey

by softyunohours



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Adoption, Babies, Christmas, Fluff, M/M, Multi, im sorry this is kinda sad??, jaemin is jaehyun’s son don’t @ me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-09-25 00:22:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17110907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softyunohours/pseuds/softyunohours
Summary: He doesn’t blame Yunoh as his drunk husband sobbed into his shoulder, he knew that the anxiety isn’t something they can control. Yunoh doesn’t know what to do after this. Youngho hasn’t a clue either. Yunoh can only cry for the baby they almost had.—in other words: johnjae are trying to adopt around christmas





	empty whiskey

**Author's Note:**

> i’m sorry this is my first time writing on here?? spare me

Youngho knew that today he needed to dedicate his time to christmas shopping for his friends. They were all having a big party on christmas eve, as they all wanted to be together (and some of the others didn’t have the money to go home for christmas). 

“Love, are you absolutely sure you don’t want me to stay?” The older asked as he slipped on his boots, hair falling in his face as he looked up for the younger. 

“Really, it’s okay, Youngho. It shouldn’t be hard talking to him, I got this. And we have the list so you’re okay.” Yunoh said with shaking hands, pillows being tossed on the floor so he could adjust the couch cushions. They were in the process of trying to be accepted as suitable parents to adopt since they couldn’t have their own. Today was just a house inspection to deem it baby-safe. “Take my card and buy some of the things with it for the guys.” Yunoh tosses his wallet at Youngho and whips around to grab the pillows he threw. 

Youngho hums in amusement, “Alright. Take it easy, don’t break anything while i’m gone.” and heads out the door. 

Shopping for their friends was relatively easy, considering they all were very close and knew each other like the back of their hands. Youngho didn’t use Yunoh’s card, since he felt that it wasn’t much money anyways for the eleven of them. Some gifts were more expensive than others, but he wanted to give his boyfriend a break, so he paid for it all. 

Taeil gets fuzzy socks (that man obsessed over socks).  
Taeyong gets a sound board (the thingy that you press buttons and make music—“it lights up!”-taeyong), and another gift from Yunoh that Youngho doesn’t know of.  
Yuta gets a figurine of a character from his favourite anime (youngho doesn’t know the name, only that “he plays volleyball and has grey hair!”).  
Kun gets a bracelet with amethyst beads (he likes meaningful things or whatever).  
Dongyoung gets a bunny plushie, as his sister’s dog destroyed his favourite one.  
Ten was getting a collective group present, they all pitched in to get him a plane ticket back home to thailand (he hasn’t had the money to go home in years).  
Sicheng was getting a present from Yunoh (Youngho thinks it’s a necklace).  
Jungwoo gets a new eyeshadow pallet (an expensive gift he's been making googly eyes at).  
Yukhei gets a hoodie decorated with the hong kong flag (he's obsessed with his birthplace).  
Minhyung’s (mark) present is already at home, canadian syrup shipped straight from vancouver.  
And their youngest Donghyuk gets a nice pair of shoes (Youngho typically spoils Hyuk anyways, so this isn’t anything new).

The two of them made a long list of things to get for each friend, so Youngho wasn’t completely lost while shopping. He was originally supposed to either go with Yunoh shopping, or both of them stay for the adoption centre to come check them out. But Yunoh insisted they had “zero time left” for both things and asked Youngho to go on his own. 

Coming home after a few hours out alone, the house was eerily quiet. Obviously, his first thought was to go find Yunoh in the polished house. 

A heavy sigh rose from Youngho’s chest, his hands going to his face in both stress and embarrassment from the situation. His bags now on the floor, he shuffled across their bedroom and grabbed his small boyfriend off the floor as if he was a toddler, under his arms and onto his chest. Yunoh wasn’t actually small, he was very large for a guy his age, Youngho just was bigger (in a lot of ways).

“Youngie noooo..” The boy whined, wrapping his arms and legs around Youngho anyways. Yunoh was piss drunk, which means something really bad must’ve happened for him to drink this much. His alcohol tolerance is really high, so it takes a good amount to get him even tipsy. 

“What’d you do?” Youngho sighed and sat on the bed with his drunk husband in his lap, half asleep. There were big bottles of hard liquor all over the floor, either half full or straight up empty. The sight makes Youngho nervous. Yunoh hugged Youngho tighter in his hazy state and hummed a little. “I ruined it..” he whined. “Ruined it?” Youngho asks, his stomach dropping. “My anxiety dis..disqualified us..” The younger’s voice was shaking and his tears quickly began to fall as he realised, again, that he destroyed their future. 

“Disqualified? Even though you’re on medication?” Youngho’s chest flopped and turned and stung as everything collapsed before his eyes—they couldn’t adopt the baby they had their eyes on. Of course, he doesn’t blame Yunoh as his drunk husband sobbed into his shoulder, he knew that the anxiety isn’t something they can control. Yunoh doesn’t know what to do after this. Youngho hasn’t a clue either. Yunoh can only cry for the baby they almost had (his name is jaemin). 

“There’s gotta be something else we can do..” Youngho said quietly, rubbing Yunoh’s back to hopefully calm him down—it didn’t work. Normally he’s very composed and quiet when he’s upset, but with the addition of a lot of alcohol, he loses all composure. “I ruined it… i ruined it i ruined it..” He cried so hard he felt he could barely breathe, it was self evident in the way he was wheezing, all the guilt he held on his shoulders. 

The rest of the night consists of Yunoh having multiple “depression snacks” and then passing out at 8 o’clock. Youngho kept a close eye on him—at least he was drunk at home and not drunk out in public. That would’ve been a disaster. 

——

The next morning, the eve of christmas eve before Yunoh would wake up, Youngho called the adoption centre with a heavy but hopeful heart. He sat quietly on the couch with only one light on, the curtains open and the TV off. The stand was adorned with many pictures of the two of them and their families. The pictures made him happy, gave him a better feeling about their situation. This can’t possibly be the end, right?

“Hi there- uh, My name is Seo Youngho, my husband and i just had a home-check yesterday but we were disqualified? They said my husband’s anxiety took us off the list— but he’s medicated, so i-“ Youngho’s nervous rambling is cut off by the woman trying to find them in her system, asking for his name a few more times and the baby they were trying for, which takes way too long for his liking. He had time to make coffee and finish a whole mug in the time she struggled with her computer. 

“Oh yes, right here… Yunoh and Youngho Seo?” The woman says with a shaking voice, she sounded close to kicking the bucket. “Yes ma’am, that’s us. We filled out all the correct papers and our home is safe for a 6 month old, our background checks are clean, my husband is medicated and I don’t see why we were disqualified?” 

“Who told you this? You’re not disqualified.. Who’s the person who told you this?” A heavy wave of all things good washed over him, he leaned back into the couch and almost sighed heavily in relief. “I’m not positive, ma’am. I wasn’t home during the check yesterday. Can you tell us what our next step is? When will we be allowed to bring Jaemin home?” Another long wait as Youngho basked in the great feeling that they’re still okay, and they’d be getting their child. 

Jaemin was an overall quiet baby, but he seemed to attach to the couple as soon as he met them. He was only the second child they saw that day but Yunoh didn’t want to look anymore. He wanted him. He was positive on it. 

_Jaemin. I want Jaemin. He has such soft eyes, Youngho. He holds the whole universe in them and he wouldn’t let go when I held him. Please?_

At the end of the phone call, Youngho debates heavily in his mind before he’s interrupted by a hungover husband sitting in his lap—he didn’t even notice him enter the room. Does he tell him now? Or surprise him with Jaemin? Or bring him to get Jaemin?

“G’mornin’. You’re quiet today.” The slightly smaller male leans his head on Youngho’s shoulder, looking up at him sleepily. His big calloused hands reach up and rub Yunoh’s back, deciding he’d just tell him.

“Yeah.. I called the adoption centre.”

“Did you? What happened?” Yunoh distracts himself by playing with the hoodie string of youngho’s pullover. He almost didn’t want to know what the phone call was over, he knew he blew it all. 

A downside to Yunoh’s mind, he never blacks out. Drinking to forget only to remember everything in excruciatingly accurate detail. He hates himself for it. And every time he thinks of it he remembers how much he really hates himself and then gets distracted in his own head before he realises his lovely is saying his name. 

“Did you hear what I said?” He asks gently. “No.. say it again?” Yunoh braces himself for the bad news. 

“Jaemin is ours now. We can come get him any time after noon.” 

Yunoh doesn’t believe him at first. But it all settles in when they’re at the adoption center again and jaemin is making loud happy babbles when they walk over with his bag of clothing and toys.


End file.
